Lent Day 2: Being a fool, this lent

The beginning of lent is marked by the service of reconciliation in the Eastern churches. Reconciliation is a reaching out, a touching, a yearning and a seeking of forgiveness not just for doing something wrong but for genuinely wanting to come together with someone. It is a giving up, a searching and an accepting. In St. Matthew 18:12-14 we witness to the story of the shepherd who goes behind one sheep, leaving behind ninety-nine. Truly, it is not sensible, just and fair and yet the shepherd does it.

Lent is seen by many as a time to grow in strength, make the soul and mind pure and to be ready for anything. But have we thought about becoming a fool for lent? Love, compassion and caring cannot be done practically and wisely. There is nothing practical in love. We cannot love someone without losing anything. And in today’s world that is seen as foolish. The usage, “Are you mad?”, “Are you a fool?” suggests how society looks at us when we go behind the one who has broken away from the group. It makes no sense and is not practical.

Many a time in relationships we notice with sadness that we are being made a fool. A good friend may remind us that we are being cheated and misled and it is time to fight back. The shepherd charts into unknown territory, leaving the known land, the known sheep, leaving loyalty, love and acceptance and going somewhere where strangeness and uncertainty wait. Many people we love may be taking advantage of us and will be enjoying the feeling of making a fool of us. And yet, reconciliation is to be a fool, knowing that we are being fooled and made out into a fool.

Jesus knew he was being betrayed at several points in his ministry. It was not just Judas, but other disciples, so called benefactors and even family who were making use of his fame and skills for their own benefit. Yet, this parable of the lost sheep, is a hand of reconciliation to those who betrayed him, cheated him and took advantage of him. This step of reconciliation is also done by isolating the ninety-nine, by overlooking their loyalty and love and going behind the one who strays.

The service of reconciliation is a service as the word suggests and is done within the walls of the church but perhaps should be done outside as those to be reconciled with are outside the walls of the church. This though can only be done by making those inside uncomfortable, making them wait and making them feel challenged as to why they are faithful and still waiting for the one they are loyal to. The ones inside have come for reconciliation and yet the shepherd goes after the one outside.

Being a fool for Christ and being a fool so that we move out of known and comfortable territory is a Lenten challenge for us. May we be able to take up the challenge and try to reconcile not just for a day but for the entirety of lent. Amen.

 

Lent Day 1: Learning to walk backwards

As we embark on another Great Lent, the call to return to God and be one with God is loud and clear. God’s love towards human beings reflected in the incarnation of God’s son Jesus Christ is then commemorated with seven weeks of the life, ministry, healing, suffering, death and resurrection of Jesus. As much as we see the Great Lent as something we have to do, it is also a response to God’s call to reconcile with God. This reconciliation is also then supposed to be with other human beings and all of creation as Jesus has asked us to love one another as he has loved us and as he loves his Father.

But how can we hear, see and experience God? This calls for a retreat and a walking back. People earlier have tried to walk backwards for a novelty, to break a record or for a cause. But this is not something done usually. Now research suggests that walking backwards as an exercise is good because it makes our knees and ankles strong, makes us sharper and heals our body in some significant ways.

I would like to suggest walking backwards and retreating as a way to enter into the experience of lent because it helps us see God, see one another and see ourself as well. The retreating and walking back creates a space to think, to look, to realize and to change. It is an opportunity to realize that we have erred somewhere, that we need to change, that we can do something differently and we can simply give space to someone.

The wedding at Cana in St. John 2: 1-11 is a very common bible passage, known even to non-Christians. St. Mary informs Jesus that the wine has run out. But Jesus is not very interested and says his time has not come. What St. Mary does now is a lesson in retreating and walking backwards. She steps back and tells the servers to do whatever he tells them. The element of faith of St. Mary is the faith in God’s son, the faith in Jesus her son and her faith in goodness. Yet, she realizes that she has done something wrong or inappropriate. So she steps back and yet does not lose her hope.

The stepping back or the walking backwards helps. Jesus tells the servers to fill the stone jars with water which then is transformed into wine. It is a wonderful model for the start of lent and for our life in general. Have faith in God and in one another. How much ever we love someone, be prepared to retreat and walk back. Be ready to give space and prevent them from being suffocated by our love. Husbands do likewise to your wife, wives to your husband, parents to their children and children to their parents, friends to one another and colleagues likewise. Nothing is to be taken for granted and yet hope has to remain. Everyone needs their space to act, to perform and to do.

Lent is a time to allow God to perform miracles. But the credit of the miracle is for God and we need to create that space. Priests have to create a space for the people to see God and witness to God. The closeness to God should turn to a retreat and walking backwards because otherwise others won’t get to see God. St. Mary’s walking back turns a private miracle into a public proclamation of faith. Do what we have to do and then stand back for God to work. Amen.

Better parenting as a way to lent

Taking a session for the youth during a conference does not just give an opportunity for interacting and learning from youngsters but is also a time of talking to parents. The discussions range from advice on what to tell the youth (their kid/s included), tips on parenting, tensions they face and just how difficult it is these days to be a parent. One villain which pops out a lot as a reason for children not listening is the media.

Television, internet and mobile phones seem to be top on any parents list of instruments which are misleading children today. The discussion then usually veers towards how to control the television and computer and what safeguards or complete ban of mobile phones should be followed. Any priest who preaches a lent which should avoid television, internet and mobile phones is appreciated and hailed by parents as a savior and the conversation at home will be “Did you listen to the pastor’s sermon?” The son or daughter will usually grunt “hmm” and leave it at that.

The parents will go back to church and catch hold of the pastor and ask “what is wrong with my son/daughter?” This being lent, the question is valid to the point that we can always question the existence of whatever including us, them, and it. But is it a valid question to ask during lent? Do we actually think there is something wrong with our children and it needs to be fixed?

This leads us into understanding lent in its essence. The Lenten prayers make us pray “When the body abstains from food the spirit should abstain from evil, for the spirit and body should observe lent together. Fasting from food is fruitless if we do not abstain from evil thoughts.” It is easy to put the blame on someone or something. Technology is a very convenient punching bag for everyone and thus come the questions on television, computer, internet and mobile phones. But what is the inherent evil? Is it us or is it technology?

Lent gives us time to sit back and think. Have we been good parents, a good father and a good mother? Or have we not taken the effort to understand our child/children? Being a parent is after all a life time effort and there is no successful parent as success can never be measured easily. What can be done is an effort to understand our children, the language they speak and the culture they live in. Listening to what they have to say and knowing that spending time with them is much more than buying them something to bury our guilt is an important learning for us during lent.

Deuteronomy 6:5-7 says “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.” Love is primarily the foundation of a happy household and love of God has to be a family effort initiated by the parent in all spheres of life. This is substantiated by a right living and a sincerity in the household as is mentioned in 2 Timothy 1:5 “For I am mindful of the sincere faith within you, which first dwelt in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice, and I am sure that it is in you as well.” Unless parents become sincere in their faith and practice how can one imagine children to be so? If the talk in the house is about the shortcoming of another person, won’t the child also grow up with the same framework to blame and talk ill of someone even when that is not what is expected?

Jommer Medina points out three important points that parents need to understand about their children. Educating children is their right and not a special favour, children are thinking individuals and children are not accessories.

It is important during the lent season of articulation and meditation to accept that we are not doing a favour to children by educating them. Rather it is our responsibility. It is not that children don’t have to be thankful for that but parents can’t treat their children with an attitude of less respect and the line that “I am doing everything for you” while spending very little time with them. Children unlike what we think can take decisions on their own. They know at a very young age itself when they are hungry and what colour clothes they would like to wear. Later they also know which subject they would like to choose, what career they would like and when they would like to get married. It could be that parents think that their children will always be a child even when they grow up. Being parents does not mean we get the right to flaunt around our children before others and use them to increase our status in society and appear smart before others. This will put pressure on them as they have to fulfill our expectations. Contrary to this children will have their own dreams and that may not involve following our footsteps but could be something totally different. A doctor’s child need not grow up to be a doctor as an army person’s child need not get into the army.

Calling a spade a spade is also important as giving false promises and misrepresenting facts are not a healthy way of keeping relationships. Women fighting gender violence have argued that parents need to have the same rules for their son and daughter as this will bring about a better culture. Having separate timings and making the son feel that he can get away with insulting and abusing a girl whereas the daughter is always supposed to stay within the limits of culture is having a double face for everything and this will lead to children rebelling against the system in the house.

The understanding of lent is not to change others. It is always to change us. Trying to be an understanding parent is a very good Lenten decision to take. In our usual thinking pattern we will put all the blame on technology, children, our partner, children's peers and everything but us. During lent we can take the hard decision to identify that our children are the way they are because they want to and because of the influence we have on them. If we use the Lenten prerogative to listen and identify we can easily get it that as parents a lot of changes have to be brought into our life style. We can make a world of difference to our life and through that to the next generation by practicing what we preach instead of burdening our children with expectations even we won’t be able to fulfill.

The elephant who thought that the young elephant would prove itself only if it could fly never thought that the elephant itself could not fly. This is the beauty of lent. We can work on each element of our character and become a person who understands others better than asking them to understand us. It is to say that we can use the time during lent to be a better parent and if we are still in the mold of a traditional parent then maybe we can stop being one!

Five reasons to observe lent

Another Lenten season has started and the same question arises. Why should I observe lent? What can inspire me to undergo the experience of lent? What kinds of lent are available. Here are five reasons for us to observe lent.

1. Having control of our mind. Why would Jesus have fasted for forty days? What did he do after he fasted for forty days? It does appear that Jesus was preparing for his ministry. It is said that human beings use hardly 10% of the capacity of their God given brain. Why aren’t they able to use the rest? It is primarily because they are doing things which they don’t need and in the process are also not being able to concentrate on the work at hand. Humans are also mighty bothered about what others are thinking and what is good and bad in their culture. This prevents us from using God’s greatest gift to human kind and that is our own mind. Lent is a time of taking control of our lives. It is to tell ourselves that there is a lot of good we can do for others and ourselves.
It is not to use our mind to control the minds of others but to use our mind to do good that we never thought was possible of us. It is to say that we usually give up on a struggle or don’t do something because we think that we are not capable of it. We end up not helping people not because we don’t want to but because we think we don’t have it in us. Lent gives us a great opportunity to use God’s grace through our body and make it count for someone else.

2. Forgiving is good for the mind. Forgiving others for any seeming bad they have committed against us is very good for us. Anger prevents us from forgiving and anger leads us to the next kick of getting into a fight with someone and this cycle never ends. This will lead to tensions in life and we will be very unsatisfied. Forgiving is not a prerequisite for lent which turns out to be a condition but it is something we should do out of our own free will so that it will lead to a better society.

Imagine a scenario of road rage which can be avoided with a simple smile and a better choice of words. But somehow it is not possible for us and we end up getting into a fight with someone over a matter which we later realize is not so important after all. Forgiving is never an act of weakness but an act of strength. It is not to say that we are giving up but to say that we have read any given situation better than the other person. It is a mature act of tolerance which will not make us weak but will make us strong because our mind is not obsessed with the anger we have for someone else but has already moved on.

3. Eating to share. Our culture is so obsessed with food that we are left eating all the time. It is as though we live to eat and eating is the only thing on our mind. Living to eat suggests that food is everything and all for us. This brings about a gorging on food and hoarding of food because lack of food will make us very unsettled and unsatisfied. Sharing the resources on mother earth is to truly believe that there is enough for all. Food shows, marts, restaurants, competitions, cookery books and choreographed pictures only make us more conscious and bothered about food and makes us personalize it to the extent of having it always. Lent helps to break this cycle of eating. It is not wrong to eat and Christ himself acknowledges that he and his disciples ate happily. But that was a community fellowship and not a culture of living to eat.

Eating to share means to look at whether others have eaten their share before we gorge on our own food. Is it enough to pray for the poor and the hungry or is it important to know that during lent and afterwards we should understand that what we are eating is also meant for someone else? There is enough food for everyone in this world. If that is the case why is more than half the population in India eating less than three times a day while doctors advise those who can afford a separate food regime to eat several times a day to avoid diabetes and other lifestyle diseases? Lent should be this understanding that we can eat less and reach out to those who don’t have anything to eat. This can be on several fronts. Some can donate to a home for the destitute where they are looking for a donation to cook the next meal, others can go to the streets and help many sleeping on the streets with nothing to eat, the church can start a food bank, while others still can identify a few people or at least one person they can employ and through that wipe out the hunger of an entire family.

4. Cleansing our thoughts. Lent is a time when we clean our system by eating slow, eating little and eating correct. It is not about purity and pollution but about cleansing our thoughts by having a light body and in a way to feel more energetic to do more. Slowing down helps us to think about family, friends, neighbors, acquaintances and others we see every day. It is to say that we can change the way we think.

This can help us in to engage with evils like gender discrimination, caste violence and class differentiation to name a few. It is to think with a clear mind and think better and realize that we are doing wrong to many people around us. It is to rise above the usual and offer our dining table to eat for the person who helps with chores at home, to give them a salary hike instead of spending it on something in the super market which we don’t even need. It is also to trust communities who we work with and who work for us and treat them like our own instead of having these differences based on colour and gender. Lent can definitely help this way.

5. Preparing for bad times. We are faced with a lot of ecological problems these days. Global warming is on the rise and that is already making a change to the earth and to various countries. Wars and genocide come up quickly and so swiftly that the population of the land is not ready for it. Natural disasters like the one which happened in Tamil Nadu remind us that we need to be ready for any eventuality. This being the case lent becomes a time to prepare for worse times. It is to live and eat on the most minimum and thereby prepare ourselves for any eventuality that could arise at any time. We realized with many natural disasters over the past few years that we have no idea how to survive if something happens and we have to depend a lot on divine intervention and government help.

Lent prepares us for any catch-22 situation and hardens us and strengthens us to face any eventuality. It is to work and think with the most meager of resources available so that we will survive an earth quake, a flood or any other disaster because we have already gone through a very humbling and difficult experience. Children and the aged can also be prepared. This is also where other kinds of Lenten forms help. Carbon fasting, abstaining from social media, mobile phones, television and other forms of the media teach us how to contact someone with very little technology, remember phone numbers and addresses, and walk for kilometers together when there is no other form of transport. Lent helps us with all of this.

Lent has changed over the years and yet there are so many things which remain the same. What has changed is that we can use lent to work on the different changes in our life which have happened over the past few years. Lent is so unique and a game changer and life enhancer for all. Try it. You will come out smarter and happier.

Getting into character this lent

Character is a very important aspect of an individual and helps in the spiritual life of an individual. A person with integrity and character shows good leadership skills and can always be an inspiration to others. But one cannot say that one is born with good character. Rather one imbibes good character through several ways, one of them being through experience and prayer. We get to see characters of integrity and sincerity in the bible, history and in our day to day life. Lent becomes a time to identify these characters and try to get into the character we have identified.

A lent with character is not only with food restrictions but is with certain ideals which identify a person as working for common people, the poor, sick, needy, children and women. We have characters we can take from and become because this becoming is a God inspired process of spiritual growth. In the book of Esther we read about Esther a woman who was courageous enough to reveal Haman’s treachery to the King. She moves beyond the usual barriers and gets into the character that God prepares for her.

St. Ephrem was a church father and doctor of the church who got into the character of making women teachers in the church. Bishop Anthimos writes "Ephrem was a promoter of women folk – from silence to dignity of their own. According to Jacob of Serug, the whole aim of Ephrem's teaching was a new world in which men and women would be equal. Moreover, he calls Ephrem as the second Moses for women because Ephrem took the revolutionary step of forming a women's choir (may be the first in the history of Christianity) and many of Ephrem's hymns were written exclusively for women's choirs. To him, Ephrem founded the women's choir in order to teach the Edessan Christianity right doctrines, made women teachers in the church and thereby promoted women folk from silence to the dignity of teacher. Thereby, "Ephrem presents his church with a new sight of women uttering proclamation". St. Ephrem took it upon himself to fulfill the very difficult role of being a church father with a difference with perfection. Can we also get into the character presented to us by God whereby we do things which we never thought capable of us and which people around us never thought possible?

Irom Sharmila is an ordinary woman but she has kept an entire state in limbo because she has been fasting from November 4, 2000 for repealing of the Armed Forces Special Powers Act (AFSPA). Recently the court quashed a case of attempted suicide against her. She is free but still fasting. How on earth can we compare the fast or diet restrictions of fifty days in the church to the fifteen year old fast of Irom Sharmila!? She has been playing her character as God wanted it in the hope that anti people laws will be repealed and people can have freedom in their own land. She dreams of a future where the government and people will work and live together instead of fighting each other. Irom Sharmila’s will power has given her the nick name “Iron Lady”. How many of us could fast for a common cause and personalize a problem like Irom Sharmila has done?

Romans 12:2 says “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” Character is God given but it has to be discerned and fulfilled by us. Character is also what we receive within us and what comes out from within. It is courage, will and hope that God has great plans for us and for that we have to get into the character that God has chosen for us. 1 Samuel 16:7 says “But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him; for the LORD does not see as mortals see; they look on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart.”

Let this lent be a time to get into character. This is not what we have necessarily done before but what God is backing us to do now. It is not available character but character that we are reaching out to and making as our own. It is the character that is waiting for someone to take and act upon. Are we ready? Amen.


Picture courtesy www.plymouthherald.co.uk

A lent with character

St. Luke 5:12-16
12 Once, when he was in one of the cities, there was a man covered with leprosy.[a] When he saw Jesus, he bowed with his face to the ground and begged him, “Lord, if you choose, you can make me clean.” 13 Then Jesus[b] stretched out his hand, touched him, and said, “I do choose. Be made clean.” Immediately the leprosy[c] left him. 14 And he ordered him to tell no one. “Go,” he said, “and show yourself to the priest, and, as Moses commanded, make an offering for your cleansing, for a testimony to them.” 15 But now more than ever the word about Jesus[d] spread abroad; many crowds would gather to hear him and to be cured of their diseases. 16 But he would withdraw to deserted places and pray.

There is a saying that was very popular for speech competitions in my childhood. It says “If wealth is lost nothing is lost, if health is lost something is lost but if character is lost, everything is lost.” It throws light upon one of the very important aspects of our existence. Even as we concentrate on body and soul we lose touch with the character of our very being.

Character initiates and eggs us on to do something we believe in and something which is just and right. This may not be what everyone else does but what we strongly feel should be done. It is not an outward initiation but an inside, intrinsic feeling of what our reaction should be in a particular situation. “Character is a pattern of behavior, thoughts and feelings based on universal principles, moral strength, and integrity – plus the guts to live by those principles every day. Character is evidenced by your life’s virtues and the “line you never cross.” Character is the most valuable thing you have, and nobody can ever take it away.” Jesus had character. This was build up by his relationship with God, his family and his society. But it was also a character which was against certain notions and taboos in society. The man with leprosy did not look Jesus in the face but he begs him to make him clean if he chooses. A confused character would have lead Jesus to look away from the man because that was what the majority in society did at the time. But Jesus looks at him, says yes, stretches out his hand and touches him. What Jesus did needed lots of courage because of the stigma of disease associated with leprosy or a skin disease. But Jesus’ character makes him think different and initiates an act of courage. His character is strong and is his biggest asset which is more than wealth and health.

Peter Drucker , a management expert has an interesting opinion on character. He says “A man (or woman) might know too little, perform poorly, lack judgment and ability, and yet not do too much damage as a manager. But if that person lacks character and integrity – no matter how knowledgeable, how brilliant, how successful – he destroys. He destroys people, the most valuable resources of the enterprise. He destroys spirit. And he destroys performance.” Jesus lead from the front and he did so primarily because he had character and integrity. When everyone else would have turned away from the person with leprosy he stretches out his hand. Even as people would have been shocked at what he was doing, he was courageous enough to do what he did.

During lent, many people try to work on a lot of things but conveniently ignore character as then they don’t have to change anything they do. Lent is a time which gives us an opportunity to fine tune and refurbish our character. If we have a stigma for someone based on their beliefs, disease, colour, and way of life, it means that we have to work on our character and not theirs. Do we make quick judgments on people based on what others say? If so, lent becomes a time to work on our character and how we have been formed so that we become courageous like Jesus to stretch out our hand instead of keeping it under wraps.

Aristotle offers practice of virtue as a way of developing our character. Good work with good intentions are a way to practice reshaping our character. Jesus practiced this all through his ministry. He did what his character reflected. But he still had to do it to reflect his character to others. But have we learnt from that? Our inability to make our character above our other qualifications has brought about a life that is not beneficial for us and others. This lent is a good opportunity for us to practice goodness and practice courage which should reflect the character of Jesus which we see in his courage to stretch out his hand, touch and heal the person with leprosy. Romans 5:3-5 says "And not only that, but we also boast in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us." A lent with character should not disappoint us but give us hope.

So, as part of lent, let us practise to reach out to people however they look like and whatever they believe in. Picture the scene of Jesus touching the person with leprosy and then see if we can replicate that! Get into the character of Jesus who touched the man when everyone else refused to. Reflect the character of Jesus by practising lent. Amen.

(Excerpts from a sermon preached in St. Ignatius JSO Church, K.R. Puram, Bangalore on February 22, 2015.)

Picture courtesy www.millersportcc.com

The beginning of lent

The beginning of lent in the Jacobite Syriac Orthodox Church starts with the Shubkono service which calls for being at peace with those who we are in contact with. The service is indeed of great significance and the holding of hands and offering peace to everyone brings in a serenity in the midst of the all the affliction we may be experiencing. The specialty of the service is in the reconciliation we seek with our brothers and sisters and those who assemble in church. One can obviously take this a step further by doing the same to people in the work place, school and college. The humility which this brings can obviously bring about much healing not just to the person who reconciles but also to the person who is reconciled with. The inherent meaning at the symbolism of kneeling and asking God for mercy also prepares us to humble ourselves.

Many divisions and problems can be done away with this act of reconciliation. It is important to know that reconciliation makes more sense when it is done from a position of strength. When one looks around one cannot ignore the fact that we are advised never to give up our position of advantage when we are trying to come to a peaceful agreement with someone. Countries and communities will therefore find it difficult to come to terms with a peaceful settlement by giving something away. The true spirit of lent though calls for this giving up of our strength and positions. Lent being a sacrifice also makes sense more to those who have something to sacrifice in the first place. One should be sensitive in not preaching to others to observe lent while continuing in one’s strength and using that to preach down to others.

This sacrifice leads to a strengthening in terms of one’s spirituality. This cannot be gauged in terms of the usual world we live in where strength means beating others into submission. The story of the wedding at Cana is also a sacrifice committed by Jesus for others. This is a sacrifice which takes into consideration the need of others and looks at what we can do for them. Such sacrifice of blood and sweat makes the wine taste better and stronger. Strength is given off by Jesus for the sake of others. It is a strength he possesses but is willing to give away.

The importance of working together during lent also attains importance through the story where St.Mary, Jesus and the workers all together work to strengthening the guests. Such is the strength of community lent as well. It should not matter that we are doing it personally but should rather matter that we are doing is as a team and working towards the accomplishment of a single goal. This will bring about a draining of one’s strength for the replenishing of energy and strength of another. This noble thought of being weak so that someone may become strong rings through the song Amazing Grace with the words “I once was lost but now am found, was blind but now I see.” For the one who is being reconciled with, the thought of a caring being and the possibility to find oneself and be able to ‘really see’ is liberating.

Every lent becomes a time to re-invent what we have done. The basics are always the same but the interpretations have to change so that as we grow, lent also makes more and more sense to us. This is indeed an inspiring thought. We are becoming part of a movement. This is a movement to make the poor rich and the weak strong. For this we have to lent(d) ourselves and feel the energy and inspiration that Jesus’ disciples felt when he asked them to join the movement that he put forward. May reconciliation lead to the washing away of our sins and gaining of the lives of those who lost it for us.

Will you be my Valentine this lent?

Yesterday in church I preached about preparing for the great lent. But I also preached on Valentine’s day. Obviously one would immediately resent any relation between the two. I would agree that Valentine’s as it is celebrated now does not have much in common with lent. But before we come to an obvious conclusion, let us look at both separately.

The great lent in the Jacobite Syrian Orthodox church starts after the Sunday worship, with the wedding at Cana as the gospel reading. The lent actual starts after the evening prayer on the same day. We are initiated into the great lent with thoughts from the wedding at Cana, where Jesus turns water into wine to save the wedding attended by his mother Mary and his disciples. The act of Jesus suggests love, trust, mystery and satisfaction. The love for his mother and the love for the people makes Jesus intervene, although he himself says it is not yet his time. His mother Mary despite his disinterest maintains a deep and profound trust in him when she tells the helpers at the wedding to do as he says. What happens then is a total mystery, just as worship or qurbana is a mystery. The ordinary water turns into wine. How this happens is beyond us. Finally the chief steward tastes it and declares that it is so good. He goes on to say that usually the best is given at the beginning but in this case the best is saved for the last. The satisfaction is for those who have waited till the end!

Valentine’s day is a celebration in itself and is especially popular with young people. But the myth or even history about Valentine is quite different from what we see now. Sifting among the various stories, one which is believable is one in which the priest Valentine went against the emperor’s edict that young men should not marry because he wanted them to be in his army. The priest goes against this and encourages couples to get married. Truly by this account, it is a call to a life long commitment!

Valentine’s day now has become some kind of a pressure for girls and boys, men and women. The pressure of going out with someone and being a part of a cultural performance. But I wonder whether this is how it is meant to be. The church is helping to make people understand that love is a more permanent feature and not just some one off thing once a year. This is also why we can connect Valentine’s day and the great lent.

Of course this is not an attempt to impose something on to the younger generation. What they want to do is obviously their own decision. The church or priests like me cannot judge them based on this. But what we can do is to offer our interpretation of Valentine’s day. And at the end of it all, it won’t just be a one sided version of love and love between young couples only, but a more comprehensive definition of love and how this concept can help us. We can use the concept of Valentine’s day to understand, profess and spread love to not just young couples, but to all kinds of people, groups and dispensations. The love which is compassionate, involves trust, is a mystery and gives satisfaction for those who wait patiently.