Friday, February 27, 2009

Every move you make, every step you take… let your daughter free

Every move she made was under my surveillance
Every step she took was onto a choreographed foundation
Every person she met depended on my green signal

She was my child in every sense
Brought into the world with good intention
Bringing name and fame through careful creation

One day she would be married in full celebration
To a man who closed in on my expectations
Leading to everlasting joy and fulfilment


How many times have we heard something like this? Fathers being over protective of their daughters and yet using them for their own gains? Let’s be truthful about it. How many fathers have whole heartedly greeted the news of their wives giving birth to baby girls?

The disappointment would then be converted into over protection and safeguarding of property (as they are sometimes even denied the status of human beings). As soon as someone gives the idea that this ‘property’ can be invested for good income, they are then let loose into the flesh market, movies (where they end up being used as a commodity rather than being taken seriously for their acting talent) and any job where good returns can be expected.

The final major decision will be the one of who the daughter will marry. Even though things have changed drastically, fathers in India still like their daughters to get married to their choice of a groom who will continue the work started by the father.

There definitely needs to be a change in perception and the way women are treated right from their birth to the end of their lives. The season of fasting and prayer also has to bring forth the concept of equality of the sexes in all it’s fullness. The pre-defined concept that boys can take care of themselves and girls need protection and safeguarding has to be replaced by the concept that each individual has it in her/him to decide on what she/he wants to do. And if they need help they are capable of asking.

2 comments:

ciya said...

i just loved the poem!!i loved the prose even more. i guess every girl who does not belong to the pub going forward thinking,class of society,wishes that at least she can make one decision on her own..if not all the decisions...who do i get married to??
i think most older men that i have come across ,forget who actually ends up living with the guy...or is it just plain old fear??

Fr Jerry said...

Ciya: I also hope that the women in our country get to decide what they want and it should start with the most important things in life. This could vary from woman to woman and that should be left to them.

The church also has to understand that we value our women and men and not just the men who happen to be in church committees and places which are taboo for women.

Whether fear is involved in the decisions of fathers is a good question. But is fear being used to push through the desires of men is also a significant question?

Thanks for being frank and profoundly sincere and smart in your comment. This is what India and the church needs today. Women who speak their mind.